What is your opinion on this?

[v10kingsnake]

I had to take my 7 year old daughter to the dentist today to see their 'in-house' orthodontist. This is the second time I have taken the kids there. The first time was last year and it had been the first time taking the kids to this new office since we switched dentists. The office is huge. They treat both adults and children there. The two main dentists in the office are both black guys. (no biggie nor any concern of mine but completely relevant to the story). A year ago when I first met the one Dentist and he was in the middle of treating my son, the other dentist had walked into the room to introduce himself and say hello. Both guys were really outgoing and nice enough people. The dentist that had just come in was really intrigued when he saw my wife and I and was trying to figure out where he may have known us from. I tried to tell him that I really didn't know who he was prior to that day but he was persistent that he thought we looked very familiar. After an awkward pause of him staring at us both, his partner who was cleaning my son, said " Aww you know those white people all look alike". Now my wife and I were a bit surprised that 2 men (dentists) we just met 5 minutes prior would say that to people who were A. White, and B. with children in the room, and C. people he really did not know.

My wife kind of laughed it off but I recall being somewhat 'bothered' by the incident. She convinced me to let it go though even though she also clearly thought these guys were a bit out of line. I should also probably mention that my wife's cousin works there as a dental assistant and they knew this and it was the main factor in me not escalating the blurb.

Bringing you back to the present, I am now there for the second time to meet with this 'in-house' orthodontist who happened to be a very friendly and professional woman. All goes well and we are on our way out the door when we run into one of the dentists I met the year prior. He comes right over to us being very friendly and says hello to my daughter. The dialogue goes as follows...

Dentist: Hi Madison, look at how big you have gotten, I see you brought your bodyguard with you today. (shakes my hand and says hello to me)


Madison: I'm fine.


Dentist: What grade are you in now, 3rd?


Madison: No I'm in 2nd grade.


Dentist: Really? Wow, you must be the tallest kid in the class, huh?


Madison: No not really there are some kids in the class taller.


Dentist: Really? How much taller?
Now my daughter puts her hand slightly above her head to show him how much taller some of the kids are than her.

Dentist: Really? that tall huh! Those are some really tall 2nd graders in your class. Lemme guess, they must be black right? We all know how big those black kids are.
My daugter as you can imagine (who is 7) is completely at a loss for words because i'm not sure she knew how to respond. I felt like pummeling the dumb racist fuck but she was right beside me. Instead I grabbed her hand and walked out of the office. This isn't going to be the end of this but I damn sure wasn't going to make the scene with my child bearing witness to it. What do you guys think? What would you do? Honestly...

[tucker]

I would set another appointment and have a mouth full of watermelon seeds in my mouth, and when he goes to start working on you, just tell him your black friend just had a lunch get together at his house, and say you know how those black people are.

[Greg Good]

I hope he doesn't prank call you.


Yeah, he shouldn't have said that, especially in front of your daughter. About all you can do is find a new dentist.

[1268]

Get a new orthodontist and move on...he obviously has issues with the white man and I wouldn't want his hands in my daughter's mouth with that attitude.

[InjOnly]

Originally Posted by 1268

Get a new orthodontist and move on...he obviously has issues with the white man and I wouldn't want his hands in my daughter's mouth with that attitude.

Bingo the above.

I personally however would have to stop in and tell them both, and the cousin why I chose to take my dollars to a different practice.

[torquemonster]

I wasn't there, but it sounds to me like both times these guys have a great sense of humor - maybe its dry humor rather than dark sarcasm.

If it is humor - get over it for fucks sake given how you talk online I'm amazed this created a second thought let alone a thread.

If you think its sarcasm - ask them why they said that before you go making a huge fuss about it. There's a lot more going to happen in your daughters life to make her feel uncomfortable than this, teach her to deal with it by laughing it off and telling him he was funny.

[Sadistic]

I find the remark about the tall kids being black, rather odd and awkward but our society has become too damn stuffy about racism. The world needs to stop being such pussies about such things.

[tucker]

[ADMIN]

Egress has been permanently removed from the premises. AE's will no longer be tolerated here.

Carry on.

[InjOnly]

That didn't take long.

[tucker]

Ingress and Digress are soon to surface.

[ADMIN]

Originally Posted by torquemonster

I wasn't there, but it sounds to me like both times these guys have a great sense of humor - maybe its dry humor rather than dark sarcasm.

If it is humor - get over it for fucks sake given how you talk online I'm amazed this created a second thought let alone a thread.

If you think its sarcasm - ask them why they said that before you go making a huge fuss about it. There's a lot more going to happen in your daughters life to make her feel uncomfortable than this, teach her to deal with it by laughing it off and telling him he was funny.

That might be a bit harsh considering the comment was directed towards a child. Also not sure how a guy speaks to folks on an internet board (to other adults) has anyhing to do with how someone speaks to a child. You can't fault the guy for protecting his child regardless of what else she may see later in life. A good father would be there to protect their child in every aspect they could. That's my take on it.

[v10kingsnake]

Originally Posted by torquemonster

I wasn't there, but it sounds to me like both times these guys have a great sense of humor - maybe its dry humor rather than dark sarcasm.

If it is humor - get over it for fucks sake given how you talk online I'm amazed this created a second thought let alone a thread.

If you think its sarcasm - ask them why they said that before you go making a huge fuss about it. There's a lot more going to happen in your daughters life to make her feel uncomfortable than this, teach her to deal with it by laughing it off and telling him he was funny.

You're a first class dipshit, Mitch. Why would I make a scene in front of my child? Why for fucks sake would I ask her to laugh it off and tell him something very unfunny was funny? Do you think he would have thought it was funny if I asked him why all blacks look alike? Or better yet, done so in the presence of my kid too? You're a twat of the highest order.

[v10kingsnake]

Originally Posted by ADMIN

That might be a bit harsh considering the comment was directed towards a child. Also not sure how a guy speaks to folks on an internet board (to other adults) has anyhing to do with how someone speaks to a child. You can't fault the guy for protecting his child regardless of what else she may see later in life. A good father would be there to protect their child in every aspect they could. That's my take on it.

Ouch, who says you're shooting blanks?

[tucker]

I thought it was Bill?

[v10kingsnake]

Originally Posted by tucker

I thought it was Bill?

Bill, Mitch, Jake, Harry.... One thing is for damn sure, it ain't Barry.

[torquemonster]

it went over your head.

nobody abused your child, it was simply awkward.

signed
Marvin

[BackAtYaMOFO]

Originally Posted by v10kingsnake

You're a first class dipshit, Mitch. Why would I make a scene in front of my child? Why for fucks sake would I ask her to laugh it off and tell him something very unfunny was funny? Do you think he would have thought it was funny if I asked him why all blacks look alike? Or better yet, done so in the presence of my kid too? You're a twat of the highest order.

Josh,

Wouldn't the proper thing for you to do would be to address the issue right there and then and tell the guy that you do not agree with the racial remarks and that unfortunately reverse racism is running rampant these days and needs to be addressed in a professional and adult manner.

Kids are a lot smarted than you think at 7 these days, I know I have a 7 year old and even if he did not understand the situation it wouldn't take too many words to clear it up.

You missed an opportunity to really stand up and show be a great role model in a situation where the chances of the other guy caring more about his license than beating the living shit out of you for calling him on it.

You could have esplain'd that to her too. Don't cause a sscene if the other guy will capp your ass!


PS. call the guy and tell him he's a dufus, it may save his practice and even though your standard modus is to scorch and destroy over a phone line or a cable ie. phone or computer, be a man and call the guy and deal with this professionally.

[SnakeDaddy]

On the next visit take them lunch; a bucket of KFC, some collard greens, and a watermelon for dessert. Tell them you wanted to do something nice for them and knew that black people liked this stuff.

[v10kingsnake]

Originally Posted by BackAtYaMOFO

Josh,

Wouldn't the proper thing for you to do would be to address the issue right there and then and tell the guy that you do not agree with the racial remarks and that unfortunately reverse racism is running rampant these days and needs to be addressed in a professional and adult manner.

Kids are a lot smarted than you think at 7 these days, I know I have a 7 year old and even if he did not understand the situation it wouldn't take too many words to clear it up.

You missed an opportunity to really stand up and show be a great role model in a situation where the chances of the other guy caring more about his license than beating the living shit out of you for calling him on it.

You could have esplain'd that to her too. Don't cause a sscene if the other guy will capp your ass!


PS. call the guy and tell him he's a dufus, it may save his practice and even though your standard modus is to scorch and destroy over a phone line or a cable ie. phone or computer, be a man and call the guy and deal with this professionally.

We could go back and forth on the issue all day long but I handled things the best way I thought possible. Confronting this douche head on in front of my daughter was not the best course of action in my eyes. I have little doubt that I could have explained things to her as she seems much more mature for her age than she lets on. That was not the point. I am 100% confident that at this point in her life she is still oblivious to racial division in any aspects of life and I wasn't about to introduce her to such things from a person making a jackass comment to her in a dentists office. I called the practice later that evening and had a lengthy talk with the owner and his Dentist who made the comments. Both were seriously apologetic for the comments made both times (glad the guy didn't try to deny the remarks from a year prior) and in the end that was basically all I wanted to hear. Not that it matters all that much but the dentist who made the comments told me last night that his fiance is actually a white woman. Information like that and the fact that I really now don't believe the comment was done with any malice is the reason my wife and I are chalking things up to simply a very dumb thing to say. We can call off Jesse Jackson and Rev. Al, there's nothing more to see here.